Comedy Central's Make Me Laugh Tour! My newest gig!
Saturday, October 25, 2008, 11:52 AM EST [General]
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Jesus and the apostles takes on Snoop and the dogg pound. A lesson in parenting.
Thursday, August 28, 2008, 02:48 PM EST [General]
| Jesus and the apostles takes on Snoop and the dogg pound. |
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So as most of you know my youngest son, Clay-B LOVES Snoop dog. For those of you who don't know Clay, he is my conservative, god help me, republican, white milk, wonder bread son. Am I making myself clear? And he LOVES Snoop dog. Hey that's cool. I mean I feeckin' love S to the N double O P dog you see, but this child should love Michael McDonald or some Stevie Nicks shite, but no. He loves Snoop. Got's himself a poster in his room, don'tcha know? Anyway a few years ago Clay was asking about a necklace with a St. Christopher medal on it and Clay was asking who was on the metal and what a saint is and all that shite. I tried to explain it to him the was it was explained to me in church and by my Mom/Phyllis. He just couldn't get it and I told him I was gonna have to think about it and get back to him. You can see how well the sex education talk is gonna go right? Nice! So when it was time to put him and his older brother to bed, I went into the room to say good night and tuck the kids in. I looked over as Clay-B said "Good night and sleezepp tizzight" Yeah he's like that. I realized, I can explain this to him in a way he can get it. I said to him "son, Jesus and the apostles, well it's like Snoop and the dog pound. I mean Jesus had the apostles right, they had his back if anyone feecked with Jesus. Jesus is the O.G. you know"and his face totally lifted and he smiled and said "and Snoop is Jesus and the Dogg Pound is the apostles and the Apostles are his crew". I said "YES!!!! Exactly!" That's resourceful parenting! |
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I'm doing a set on the make me laugh stand up comedy show!!!
Wednesday, August 27, 2008, 02:06 PM EST [General]
Make Me Laugh
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FEECKIN' SWEET!
I'm the REAL Momma Smush! Ya'll bytches betta recognize!
FEECKIN" SWEET!
Love you guys!
Jenny
Momma Smush
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Baseball and all that shite!
Thursday, July 24, 2008, 04:15 PM EST [General]
As most of you know I am insane for baseball. And as most of you know I USED to love the dodgers, till they got rid of everyone good. Typical of the dodgers! Feek!!!! Stupid azzed Dodgers!!! Anyfeekinway....
I am a baseball orphan, I mean I love the O's.... I live in Maryland. But come on they do great in the start but then poot out halfway through. If you disagree you lie and know I'm right! Even the most die hard fan will tell you that. I mean I do love the O's but truth is truth. They are the team you love till mid July. Like the Skankee's are the team you love to feekin' HATE!!!!
Again, ANYFEEKINWAY....
I have a gift for knowing the outcome of most games. Anyone will tell you that I am a byotch who knows my football and baseball. In week 3 of the 2005 season I told everyone that the Steelers were gonna go to the Stupidbowl, errmm sorry Superbowl, I LOVE football just a joke. After they laughed at me for 10 minutes and then picked themselves up off of the ground just to see the Steelers win the Superbowl and me stand there big belly pregnant with Jacinda, I simply said "I feekin' told you so in week 3!!!! Feeker!!" They were amazed. They're still to this day is impressed.
Why do I tell you this? Because I feekin' rule that's why. Oh and to tell you this... Watch out for Washington. Not feekin' Seattle numb nuts, Washington D.C.
I would have posted here it in the 4th inning like I did on the couch, but some butthole was on the computer!
They will at least make it to the play offs but I think they will do better this year. Restovich will kick azz this year. Watch out!!! You heard it here first.
Oh and thank god someone scored. 13 innings. I called the game in the 4th. 9 innings ago. A game ago! Now I can sleep! And now that I posted that the Nat's are gonna have a kick azz year, they will start sucking like a 5 dollar whore. I didn't just say that.....
Good night 13 innings later.
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